Saturday, October 30, 2010

When I Go Senile Will Anybody Notice?

I was sitting in the cafe trying to think of something clever and funny to write but I just couldn't. At first I thought I might have to give up on writing a blog entry today but then I just decided to do what I normally do and write down any old crap and hope for the best. I can get away with this because I don't have an editor and I don't get paid. It's amazing how simple things are to do if you have no quality control and expect no recompense.

From time to time I do attempt to write things that make sense. I try to craft entries where one sentence has a direct relationship to those on either side of it. Peeling potatoes can be very therapeutic but I would still recommend seeing a therapist. The child at the next table is crying, I guess she didn't like her junior soy latte. The place is awash with small, well groomed dogs. How old do you have to be before you stop wanting to do the things you are now too old to do? Thank god that woman has a land rover to help her navigate the treacherous landscape of Newtown.

On close examination I find that much of the previous paragraph didn't make a lot of sense which is funny because it actually represents a complete and thoroughly coherent train of thought just with a couple of linkages missing. To be honest (and I always try to be honest except when I'm lying)...where was I? Oh yes, to be honest many people would doubt if I am capable of having a coherent train of thought but pickle Ferdinand walrus. In these days of declining literacy simply writing things down is getting increasingly rare. I think I am about two generations away from being a serious literary figure. Of course in two generations time there won't be anyone who can read so my enhanced status will be meaningless.

I have completely lost track of what I was trying to say assuming I was trying to say anything which a swift review of this blog gives me serious cause to doubt. One of the things I find most annoying is when people who have nothing to say won't shut the fuck up. However reading a blog is a purely voluntary act on the readers part so I feel no guilt. If, like me, you think this entire blog entry was an act of pointless self indulgence may I suggest that you wait two generations and then read it again. At that point it will still be semi literate gibberish but there will be less competition. And lets face it, by that time you probably won't be getting out much anyway.

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