Monday, May 28, 2012

Bread and Dynamite

Never cast your bread upon the water.  For one thing it makes the bread all soggy.  Secondly there seems to be little point unless you enjoy the sight of your sandwich floating gently down the stream.

What was the origin of that particular phrase I wonder?  I've read Tom Sawyer so I know that once upon a time people used bread to find bodies that had been taken by the river but unless you have a fetish for waterlogged corpses (and if you do please don't leave a comment) I don't really see the point.  After all you don't want to be tripping over time expired corpses every time you toss a loaf into the water.  Feeding ducks would become a thing of horror.

In fact the only reason I can think of for throwing a loaf of bread into a river is if you're hoping to hit a fish.  A yummy fish dinner would certainly make up for the fact that you're definitely not going to be having toast.  Still if that is your intention you would probably do better to cast dynamite upon the water.  Then you'll be able to have fish and toast and the gunpowder will probably provide a little seasoning.

For some reason fishing with dynamite does seem to be a little frowned on by purists.  I'm not entirely sure why.  Personally I can't see a heck of a lot of difference between killing fish with the locally acquired equivalent of a depth charge and dragging them from their native habitat by ramming a steel hook into the roof of their mouth.  I know which I would prefer if given a choice.  I suspect there is a bit of snobbery behind the entire prejudice against dynamite.  Dynamite fishing is considered to be the preserve of semi literate rednecks whereas angling is the preserve of semi literate rednecks who can afford fishing gear.

Of course the truly destitute are reduced to hurling lumps of bread at passing fish and hoping for the best.

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