Is it Called Twitter Because its for Twits?

This officially sucks. I have been running this blog for over a year now dishing up a stream of mindless, semi coherent and occasionally amusing drivel. I thought I was getting somewhere and then Charlie Sheen comes along and without any effort just blows me out of the water.

My own personal bitterness aside, isn't it great that Charlie can be flashed all over the world in a matter of seconds? Back in the old days every village had to provide its own idiot, now we only need one. No doubt some technology hating Luddites out there will yearn for the days when such things were home produced. "Charlie Sheen," they will say, "is taking bread from the mouths of honest local idiots and causing unemployment amongst crazed loons everywhere."

It's about time these killjoys learnt to move with the times. Sure it will be tough for a while but I'm sure that with a little retraining the redundant idiots will find gainful employment in either the drug addict or homeless crazy person industries. Besides what is Charlie to do? He has a couple of ex wives (proof of the greater fool theory), a cocaine dealer and a porn star to support. The man must do something.

Isn't it amazing how the world changes though? There was a time when if one came across a dishevelled, substance abusing nut job one either gave them a couple of dollars or doused them in petrol and set them on fire depending on ones personal proclivities. Nowadays we follow them on twitter and nobody has to be doused in anything.

Twitter is awesome as well. Before twitter mindless, boring people would take up hours of your time droning on about inconsequential crap nobody but them gave a rats about whereas now they have to limit it to one hundred and forty characters or less. You can't tell me that isn't progress. Nowadays when somebody wants to tell me about the progress of their hernia operation I just tell them to get a twitter account.

Facebook, twitter, netcasts (I must admit I thought that last one was a fishing term) and the like have rendered a priceless service to the human race. They have made privacy so much easier. If you want privacy nowadays all you have to do is turn off your computer. It's not like anybody is actually going to visit you or anything. They'll simply assume you've vanished into thin air.

Wait a minute, if you turn off your computer you won't read my blog. Please, please, please don't turn off your computer. I need your validation, without you I don't exist. I promise I'll try and be more like Charlie Sheen in the future, or less; whichever you want. Just keep reading please, I'm begging you.

I love you.