Sunday, April 23, 2023

Travelling Hopefully - Invigorating and Toned Edition

 How many blog entries can I do before my holiday actually starts?  Hopefully by the time you read this I will have arrived in London and started to knock some of the fog out of my brain.  So far the closest I’ve come to London is San Francisco and brain fog abounds.

Changing planes in San Francisco was surprisingly trouble free.  Yes I needed to get off the plane, go through passport control, collect my luggage, drop my luggage off, walk around a corner and go through passport control again all to essentially wind up about three hundred yards from where I started.  On the other hand this all took quite a refreshingly short period of time.  Incidentally I said yards rather than metres in deference to the fact that the Americans still cling to the imperial measurements of their erstwhile colonial overlords despite the fact that said overlords ditched it themselves more than half a century ago.

My swift passage through America’s layers of border security did leave me with an embarrassingly large amount of time on my hands.  My head was drooping and my eyes were hanging out so I repaired to the lounge for food and shelter and thus pseudo refreshed I stumbled towards another aircraft that promised to take me to Britain.

Fortunately when it came to pseudo refreshment my aircraft had the last word.  In the toilet was a bottle of something calling itself “face mist”.  According to the bottle it “invigorates and tones”.  You know as opposed to just getting your face mildly damp.  I sprayed some on every time I went to the bathroom and by the end of the flight I was hopping about the plane like a baboon while the stewards tried to catch me with nets.  As for taut, the skin of my face looked like it had been stretched over a skull a size too big.  Which was unfortunate as the rest of my skin, unaffected by the face only mist, still looked like it had been flung haphazardly over a skeleton a couple of sizes too small.

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