The Weather Is Always Weather When its Weather

It occurs to me on a cursory glance over my previous blog entries that phrases like "blasted hellscape" seem to crop up a little more than is healthy and furthermore there are disturbingly frequent references to cannibalism.  A casual reader (and I doubt if I have any other kind) could be forgiven for thinking I'm an apocalyptic nutcase with a cannibalism fetish.  I would like to assure everyone that this is not entirely correct.

With that out of the way I can get on with today's blog entry.  It is a blazing hot day which puts me in mind of a cannibalistic hellscape.  No wait, I mean its a warm tranquil day that reminds me of the carefree years of my childhood.  OK, I think I saved that one.  Summer it seems has come late this year.  Which, since Summer was supposed to start last year should surprise no one.  It seems that Autumn is being crowded out of the picture entirely.  By the time Autumn is ready to go Winter will be tapping on its shoulder.  I suspect there will be one day sometime in May when every leaf will suddenly fall off the trees and then it will start snowing.

Now that Autumn has been reduced to little more than a footnote we can start working on Spring.  I don't honestly think we need more than two seasons really.  In fact we could probably reduce it to one and rename it Weather.  Then, no matter what the weather was like we could say, "It's Weather, what do you expect?" and all of the other self evident and totally useless phrases we use for discussing the weather.  In fact with a bit of luck we can stop talking about the weather entirely.

I can't stress how much of a benefit to society ceasing to talk about the weather would be.  My research (and by research I mean I just made it up) indicates that approximately one third of all conversations involve the weather to some degree.  Think of all the time that would be saved.  Productivity would soar, boredom would be reduced and best of all people who really didn't want to talk to each other wouldn't feel the obligation to do so.  This last really could be the salvation of society.

How many wars have been started because people who really shouldn't associate have been brought together against their will by inadvertent discussions about the weather?  Flaming hatreds have been born where before it is likely that they would have remained as merely surly disregard.  It has been suggested that interaction can breed tolerance and understanding.  This is quite possibly true but it is equally likely that interaction can merely reinforce and exacerbate the low opinion one had of ones interlocutor on first meeting.  Talking leads to arguing, arguing leads to fighting and fighting leads to war.  Before you know it we're back in blasted hellscape and cannibalism territory again.  I don't think anybody wants that.  Or at least I feel a majority of people would view such an outcome with a certain level of disapproval.  I hope.