Snails Rule but Beetles Die

There are beetles everywhere in my apartment. Mainly they seem to be in the sink. What with snails on the balcony and beetles in the sink it would appear that I am being overrun by invertebrates. I don't mind the occasional insect buzzing about the place but these beetles don't buzz. All they do is float sluggishly in my sink. Somehow they manage to do it even when I haven't left any water in there. Apparently I am only visited by the suicidal type of beetle. Those beetles with a healthy, well adjusted personality avoid my place like the plague.

I'm not sure why my apartment got selected as the place where beetles crawl away to die but I'm getting a little tired of fishing their corpses out of the sink. I appear to have become a de facto funeral director for the beetle community. I feel as though I should wear black as I pitch their corpses into the bin.

I wonder where all the happy beetles are? No doubt they're off frolicking in the atmosphere having a great old time while the miserable beetles hang around on the sidelines painting their feelers black and muttering to themselves until it all gets too much and they make the final journey to Neil's place from which no beetle ever returns. Of course its possible that they see it differently.

Perhaps in the beetle world I am the reaper, the doorkeeper at the gates of death. My mild bespectacled visage is the very face of mortality and eternal darkness. Is it creepy that I find that image rather appealing?